


Of Truth, Of Lies

by LeChatRouge673



Series: Cat's Song [7]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-03 19:39:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14003226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeChatRouge673/pseuds/LeChatRouge673
Summary: My darling SWF, @slothquisitor, made the following inquiry:“How drunk would I have to get you to agree to write more pre-Songs Thea and Loghain for me?”JOKE’S ON YOU LOVE. I don’t have to be drunk at all, as I will cheerfully write these two at pretty much any given time.NSFW.





	Of Truth, Of Lies

_A sky, a night_   
_The black, the white_   
_A push, a pull_   
_The Prince, the Fool_   
_The harsh, the kind_   
_A day, a life._

-“The Rules for Lovers” by Richard Walters

 

* * *

 

 

‘Cold’ was the word she had most often heard used to describe him. ‘Brilliant’ was probably a close second, especially in reference to war or tactical skill, but when most people spoke of Teyrn Loghain Mac Tir, ‘cold’ was often the description of choice. Which Thea could not help but find odd, because at the moment, she was feeling nothing but heat, and it was threatening to consume her completely.

It had been such a simple thing… just a kiss… but the heat of his lips against hers had sent her spiraling, and it had taken all her remaining willpower to drag him from the guest bedroom to her own. She would be damned if their first time together was in anything other than either her bed or his. Clothes had been shed with alarming ease, and now Thea was being utterly overwhelmed by the warmth of his hands as they ran over every curve of her body, more assured than she probably should have expected them to be, and yet it felt completely right.

‘Cold’ was so utterly inadequate to describe Loghain.

Thea inhaled deeply as his lips left hers, beginning to trail down the curve of her neck and tracing the line of her collarbone. She could not stop the desperate hum that rose from her throat; was not entirely certain she wanted to. They had been dancing around each other for months, neither willing to make the admissions, or possibly the confessions, required to take their friendship any further than they had. Now that they had, Thea was torn between the concentrated pleasure of the moment and the guilt she felt in her heart.

_You have to tell him the truth_.

Loghain’s mouth had moved lower, brushing too light kisses to her breasts, tongue teasing against her nipples and causing her to arch her back insistently against his lips, desperate for more. She could swear she felt him smile as he took one stiff peak into his mouth, his teeth scraping against the impossibly sensitive skin and sending a shock through her body. Her nails raked down his back, still careful not to leave marks where anyone else would ever see them. No: this was for them, and them alone. A secret; a promise.

_Damn it_.

Her arms wrapped too easily around his shoulders, pulling him back up to her lips. She kissed him long and deep and harder than she probably should have, but he seemed willing enough to return the gesture. His hands followed the curves of her breasts down to the dip at her waist and further to her hips, resting there and tracing the lines of her hipbones. Loghain was being more gentle than she expected; more gentle than she thought she needed.

“You are not going to break me, you know,” she teased quietly, running her hand through his hair and bringing it to rest on his cheek.

He gave a small huff of laughter. “No, I very much doubt that,” he agreed. “You, on the other hand, may very well break me.”

_Never_.

“You may be giving me too much credit,” Thea retorted, pressing against his chest until he lay on his back on the bed and she had straddled his hips, just close enough to not be nearly enough. She leaned down to brush a kiss against his lips, the auburn fall of her hair tumbling over her shoulder to pool against his chest. Loghain’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer until they were kissing each other properly. Thea had spent far more time than she should have thinking about what this would be like; what she _hoped_ it would be like.

“This is so much better,” she whispered as they finally parted, breathless.

“Better than what, Theadosia?” He asked, carefully brushing aside a lock of hair from her cheek.

“Than what I imagined,” she quirked an eyebrow with a small half smile before pressing a line of kisses against his cheek and jaw, down his neck and the lines of his chest.

“Exactly how long have you been thinking about… this? About us?”

She paused, folding her arms over his lower abdomen and resting her head on them before looking at up him through lowered lashes. “Really? You want to have that discussion now?”

He lips twitched slightly into something that was not quite a smile; not quite a smirk. “I never said you had to stop.”

“I have a very talented tongue, Loghain Mac Tir, but even I can only do one thing with it at a time.”

  
Loghain rolled his eyes, but he reached down and stroked her hair softly. “How long, Theadosia?”

She sighed.

_Tell him the fucking truth_.

“I don’t have a good answer for you, Loghain,” she admitted, pressing a kiss to his stomach. “Longer than I should have been. I liked you from the day we met; you know that. When it shifted to something more than that? I am not certain. I did not exactly mark my dayplanner. ‘18 Cloudreach, decided I wanted to sleep with the leader of Fereldan’s armies.’” She felt more than heard the brief snort her remark prompted. She moved her mouth slightly lower, her lips brushing against the tip of his cock before her tongue flicked briefly over its length. Thea heard a sharp intake of breath; did not bother to try and hide the slightly smile that curved at her lips.

“For that matter,” she continued conversationally, as if neither of them were drawn taut as bowstrings and liable to snap at any moment, “I could ask you the same question. I am a risk even under the best of circumstances, and I think we can agree that these are not the best circumstances.” She took him into her mouth, her hand and lips marking a precise, agonizing pattern that she knew was more likely to drive him to distraction than get her answers.

_You already know the answer_.

A long, low, groan issued from Loghain’s throat, and Thea moved her body back up alongside his, trailing kisses as she went and letting the warmth of his skin against hers anchor her to the room; to the bed; to _him_. He rolled her back so that she was laying flat against the bed, the clear blue of his eyes meeting hers.

“Theadosia, I have been able to think of little else other than you for months, and it seems to have only been getting worse.” He leaned down and bit gently at the spot where her neck met her shoulder, and a small moan broke from her lips as she nuzzled closer to him.

“This is still a terrible idea,” he murmured against her skin, his hand moving between her thighs and stroking briefly against her heat.

“So walk away,” she taunted even as her arms remained twined around his neck.

Loghain looked at her, and he tilted her chin up slightly so that she was looking directly into his eyes. “As if I could ever walk away from you, Theadosia.”

_You are going to get your heart broken._

Her breath caught in her throat as he entered her, filling her and sending sparks shooting behind her eyes. He waited, watching her, holding her steady in his arms.

“Are you alright?”

Thea nodded, her words still failing her. Finally, she arched up and pressed a kiss to his cheek and whispered, “I will be alright as soon as you keep going, darling.”

Loghain shook his head, but he was smiling slightly. His hips thrust against hers as her own rose up to meet the steady rhythm he set. When she reached down to tease against her clit, he pushed her hand aside. “Best let me figure it out now,” he suggested. “It will save us time later.”

“Think you’ll get another chance at it, do you?” Thea laughed breathlessly.

“Oh, I plan on it,” he replied, his fingers exploring her even as they moved together. “You will tell me what works?”

“Mmm,” she hummed, her eyelids fluttering shut. “A little lower… little more to the left… _oh_.” Thea practically felt her body sink further into the bed as every nerve in her body sparked to life. She felt the familiar heat burning in her core, somehow unfamiliar now for the man she was sharing it with; so much brighter, a tempest rather than a lightning bolt. One last gasp of breath, and she fell over the edge. Through the hazy edges of her consciousness she felt Loghain’s body grow taut, then relax as he fell beside her, his breath unsteady in her ear as he held her close.

_Too late; too late now._

“Theadosia,” he whispered, his arm wrapping around her waist and pulling her close against his chest, lips pressing kisses against her shoulder, her neck, her cheek…

_I love you_.

 

* * *

 

 

Loghain splashed cold water over his face, trying to sort out everything that had happened the night before. A lack of memory was not the problem; in fact, he could remember everything from the time he had kissed Theadosia onward with perfect clarity. _That_ was the problem.

He could have left after the sex. He _should_ have left. Their current… whatever it was… was predicated on neither of them letting things go too far. She was his closest, void, possibly his _only_ real friend. The thought of losing that simply because a romantic entanglement did not pan out was painful. Unfortunately, the pain of not being with her had overshadowed the more logical and sensible of his needs.

And so he had stayed the night. Loghain had laid down beside Theadosia, his arm wrapping around her waist as though out of habit, drawing her close, feeling the warmth of her against his body. They had fallen asleep that way, and he’d had the best night’s rest in years. At some point she had gotten up in the grey hours of morning to shower and brush her teeth, and he had done the same when she came out, still utterly bare and toweling off the long wet waves of her auburn hair before crawling back into bed.

The woman was more beautiful than she had any right to be, but that was surprisingly far down on the reasons he had found himself desperate for her: she was brilliant: clever and with a razor sharp wit that challenged him like no one else ever had. She had a beautifully dry sense of humor, but underneath was a heart that was passionately loyal and fiercely protective. And Loghain knew it had already endured more than it ever should have. He was one of the few people who _did_ know just how much. Theadosia trusted precious few; that she trusted him was an act of faith Loghain knew he could never deserve.

Damned if he wasn’t trying, though.

He patted his face off with a towel before stepping back into the bedroom. Early spring sunshine was filtering through the blinds and casting Theadosia’s skin in a soft glow where it was not covered by the blanket. Loghain could leave now; kiss her goodbye and walk out the door and get on with his life.

He slipped back under the covers, wrapping his arms around her as she snuggled close to him, her eyes still closed and her half mumbled words still heavy with sleep. Loghain pressed a kiss to her forehead, settling back into bed with a muted sigh.

This had been a mistake, and it was going to continue being a mistake. Not because he did not care about Theadosia; rather, because he cared entirely too much. They had agreed not to let it go to far: neither of them had acknowledged the possibility, the _probability_ , that it already had. He should have told her how he felt; told her the truth before they had fallen into bed together.

He should have told her he loved her.

Coward that he was, he hadn’t said a word. There were a dozen reasons, if not more, but the one that had stayed his tongue was purely selfish. While he wanted to believe that she felt the same way, the possibility that she didn’t… so long as neither of them spoke the words, things could continue on as they were. They would keep their relationship, or whatever it was, a secret.

“So,” Theadosia’s voice was soft and slightly muffled against his chest. “Is this the part where I do the clichéd thing and offer to make you breakfast? Because I can, though I am not exactly sure what I have in the fridge. You know my eating habits are… slightly erratic.”

Loghain laughed softly. “Sweetheart, your eating habits are atrocious. You know I wish you would eat more consistently, but no: I do not expect you to make me breakfast. We could walk up the street to that coffee shop you like. We’ve been there together before; it would not look particularly odd.”

“Mmm,” she nodded in agreement before pressing one more kiss to his lips and rolling out of bed and digging through her drawers for clothes. “That sounds lovely. You know how I feel about my coffee.”

“I do,” he agreed, then he sighed. “Theadosia… I think Anora knows.”

“Of course she does,” she shrugged.

“ _What?_ ”

Theadosia’s quiet hum of laughter was muffled as she pulled a light sweater over her head. “Loghain, she is my friend. I told her how I felt ages ago, and she approved. Encouraged it, actually. Although, to be honest, I am not certain I would have been able to stay away from you even if she hadn’t…” She approached the edge of the bed and sat on his lap, facing him, her arms resting on his shoulders. “Loghain, I know you do not like keeping secrets from her, and I did not want you to have to. I trust Nora to keep this quiet, for as long as necessary.”

Because of course she had thought of that. Despite her best efforts to argue to the contrary, Theadosia did not like to see the people she cared about unhappy. Loghain knew that, if Anora had protested, Theadosia would have backed off. However, the fact that Anora _had_ known, and had encouraged it… Maybe this was not as impossible as he had once thought it to be.

_Damn it. I love her_.

“Theadosia, I-”

She did not let him finish his thought, instead pressing her lips to his and kissing him deeply. When she pulled away, he recognized all too easily the look in her eyes. She knew. She understood.

She loved him too.

And neither of them could say the words.

 


End file.
